When I was younger I used to tell myself that I MUST become a footballer or I’d be poor like my parents and nobody would like me. I never became a footballer.
I then accepted the message from teachers and parents that I MUST get a good education in order to get a good job. I went to university, got a First Class degree and a few weeks after graduation I found myself unemployed in the job centre signing on.
I finally found an internship and told myself that I MUST work hard in order to be offered a job that way my family and friends would see that my £25k or so worth of student debt was well worth it. I got the job and quit a year later.
MUST is an evil word. Every time we tell ourselves that we MUST do or have something we automatically brand ourselves as inadequate.
MUSTs can come in all shapes and sizes but are often adopted beliefs passed down from parents, teachers, peers, and society in order to keep you in a perpetual chase for love, acceptance, identity, security or all of the above in which you’re forever falling short.
For the last few years I’ve been on a serious MUST detox. Books, podcast and mentors have helped me to let go of the many MUSTs I have accumulated over my life so far and returned me to a point in which I feel much happier just ‘doing me,’ which has opened up many opportunities I never thought possible, one being paid to podcast and write this very blog!
I truly believe that by challenging just one MUST you’re holding on to today can be a life changing experience.
FILL IN THE BLANKS: I feel that I MUST ____________________ because _________________.
Now take the time to break down where this belief has come from and challenge it!
Why? Who said that? What are the consequences of not believing it? What would you do if you stopped believing it? Does this belief truly serve me?
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